My Transformational Story

I recall being 21 years old at a university in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. This was a pivotal time for me, three major hurricanes had damaged my home in the Bahamas and my family was not able to support me financially anymore. I had a government grant that paid for my school fee, and I had a job on campus that covered room and board. I was the typical young man working in America at the time. It was an office job but for some reason I felt it was ok to dress down (short jeans and color T-shirts) because no one said a word to me directly. I felt that because they were paying me minimum wage it didn’t require me to “dress up”, so I didn’t. My grades were ok, but could have been much better. I did work hard when I came to work, but after work I really partied a lot.

I remember this particular semester my government grant came in late, as a result I had to register late for class (during the second week). On my way to class my co-worker called and said that he was running late, so I had to wait until he could relieve me. So now I am late for my first day in class which is the second week because I was just able to register for class. I opened the door to generally greet the class but before I can say anything the instructor said that “students that are late for my class will never make it in life”. I thought this to be weird, because it was as like he was waiting for me to walk in the classroom. He then asked me “what are you doing in my class?” I said that “this is my class”. He asked me why was I late and I told him why. He then asked me what am I studying or pursing at the university. I said a bachelor of science in accounting. He then said “you don’t look like an accounting student” he said “you look like someone that is wasting their time”. “Accounting students are usually punctual, and pay attention to detail…you are neither” he said. He then told me I should drop his class because I won’t make it. I didn’t make any disrespectful comment to him in return even though he made such rude comments to me, it seemed that because he knew that it was very easy for a student worker to lose their job on campus if an instructor reported you for negative conduct. he was doing this intentionally because he did in fact knew me from working in the academic office, and he also knew that I need my job on campus very desperately. I just left the class and went home.

I felt so upset and broken that I literally walked home. Home was 6.5 miles from the university. While I walked home I thought to myself, “what if he is right?””is this the image that I am projecting” and I just couldn’t shake the feeling that he seem to went out his way to try upset me so that I would lose my cool and my job. I didn’t want to feel this way again. I felt like dirty muddy rocks. I decided that it was time for me to grow up, stop feeling sorry for myself and take control of my destiny. I said to myself “while I am just 21 years old, I AM 21 YEARS OLD and I need to project an image that demands respect. I need to project on the outside the person I am trying to become. No one cares that things are hard for you, things are hard for a lot of people.” From that day on, every day I tried to be better than the person I was the day before. I learned how to accept criticism and how to use it to become better, stronger, and experienced. From that experience my mind was transformed. I wanted to be so great, but was not willing to put in any work, because I walked around with a sense of entitlement.

I feel very much that others can benefit from my story, particularly the less fortunate that had to struggle through the undergrad years. My story teaches about continuous humility and perseverance, also about overcoming obstacles and unforeseen circumstances. One phrase that kept me going is that every obstacle is an opportunity for more improvement.

After reflecting on my past and reading articles, particularly “(Margolis, Joshua D. and Stolz, Paul G., 2010) How to Bounce back from Adversity” I believe that my transformational story illustrates a positive example of what should be in the face of adversity. The key concepts discuss in this article was: Control, Impact, Breadth, and Duration. It also went further in each concept to discuss: specifying, visualizing, and collaborating. The article spoke in dept about “(Margolis, Joshua D. and Stolz, Paul G., 2010) The Capacity for Resilience” … “The Resilience Regimen”.

In reference to my transformational story I believe that I took control of the situation when looked within myself to address what I can do to improve myself, instead of directing blame. Taking control early in adversity seems to be very important. It believe it to be like a wheel that directions a car when in motion. While the impact was very damaging to myself esteem, and my feelings it would have been very easy to give into those desires and bad habits of self pity and loathing the individual that made you feel that way. I did no such thing though, because I was going to make certain that this situation would make a positive impact in me. I dictated what happened next, and it was based on my dreams and the person I always aspired to be. The breadth of the situation could have been negative. I could have done the opposite and become very spiteful in the future, give into self pity and/ or just give up on my dreams entirely. I chose the opposite, because I do believe that every obstacle is an opportunity for improvement. I believed that this situation can and will be the corner stone of “the new me”. To me the ability to see the positive in every negative is a “winner’s complex”. From that day I most certainly was going to be develop a “winner’s complex”. After deciding to move forward in a positive way, I began developing five year, and ten year plans. I did this to keep myself on course for success. This is the final part of “(Margolis, Joshua D. and Stolz, Paul G., 2010) The Resilience Regimen” duration. “What can I do now to address the problem?” I believe that I am very fortunate to have found resilience at such a young age.

The key concepts in this article help to explain my transformation, and I would imagine that it would help to examine and explain many other transformations, being positive or negative. In addition to explaining and examining transformations it gives in dept step by step process on how to overcome adversity and keep on track. In another article I recall reading about derailment, and how easy it is for professionals who were very successful in their career to derail when facing adversity. The article when on to say that failure to adapt, adjust to meet new demands causes derailment. In my transformation story above, I could have continued to derail but I fought with resilience to adapt and adjust. Thinking back on this story I consider myself to be fortunate to be able to respond in such in manner.

Margolis, Joshua D. and Stolz, Paul G., 2010, How to Bounce Back from Adversity, Harvard Business Review

Velsor, Ellen Van and Leslie, Jean Brittain, 1995, Why Executives Derail: Perspectives across Time and Cultures, Academy of Management, The Academy of Management Executive (1993-2005), Vol 9, No. 4, (Nov 1995), pp 62 - 72